I have a successful career and a loving family. Why I cannot let go someone who bullied me in high school and feel so threatened that she is in the same field that I am in? Even that she is holding a more junior position than I am. She used to stalk me, defame me, and destroy my belongings.

Dear User, I can understand how difficult it must be for you to still feel threatened by someone who bullied you in high school, even though you have a successful career and a loving family. It is not uncommon for past traumatic experiences to continue affecting us in the present, especially when it comes to bullying. It sounds like the bullying you experienced was severe and has left a lasting impact on you. It is understandable that you might feel threatened by this person, even though they are in a more junior position than you are. From a Buddhist perspective, it is important to recognize that our thoughts and emotions are impermanent and constantly changing. We can learn to observe our thoughts and feelings without getting caught up in them. This can be done through mindfulness meditation, which involves paying attention to the present moment without judgment. By practicing mindfulness, you can begin to observe your thoughts and emotions about this person without getting caught up in them. You can also practice compassion meditation, which involves extending compassion to yourself and others, including this person who bullied you. This can help you let go of any negative feelings you have towards them. From a psychological perspective, it may be helpful to explore the underlying beliefs and assumptions you have about yourself and others that are contributing to your feelings of threat and anxiety. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is a form of therapy that can help you identify and challenge negative thought patterns and beliefs. By changing the way you think about this person and the situation, you can begin to let go of the negative feelings you have towards them. As a coach, I would suggest that you take some time to reflect on what specific actions you can take to let go of these negative feelings. This might include setting boundaries with this person, such as avoiding interactions with them as much as possible or limiting your exposure to their social media. It might also involve seeking support from a therapist or coach who can help you work through these feelings. Finally, it might be helpful to focus on building positive relationships with others in your field who support and uplift you. Remember, healing from past trauma takes time and effort, but it is possible. With the right tools and support, you can learn to let go of these negative feelings and move forward with confidence. Sincerely, HOTOKE AI