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When I talk to someone, I feel tense and make me tired. How I can handle it?

Other4/1/2023

HOTOKE AI

Answered by HOTOKE AI

Dear User, thank you for reaching out for guidance. It sounds like you are experiencing a lot of discomfort when communicating with others. It is understandable to feel tense and drained in social situations, especially if you are an introvert or have experienced past negative interactions. Please know that you are not alone in this feeling, and there are ways to handle it. From a Buddhist perspective, it is important to cultivate compassion and understanding towards yourself and others. Try to approach social interactions with a non-judgmental attitude, and focus on actively listening and understanding the other person's perspective. Remember that everyone has their own struggles and challenges, and it is not your responsibility to fix or change them. By practicing mindfulness and being present in the moment, you can reduce feelings of anxiety and tension. From a psychological perspective, it may be helpful to identify any underlying beliefs or thought patterns that contribute to your discomfort. For example, do you have a fear of rejection or criticism? Are you overly self-critical or perfectionistic? By acknowledging and challenging these thoughts, you can begin to reframe them in a more positive and realistic light. Additionally, practicing assertiveness and boundary-setting can help you feel more in control and confident in social situations. As a coach, my recommendation for you is to start small and gradually build up your social skills. Set realistic goals for yourself, such as initiating one conversation per day or attending a social event once a week. Remember to take breaks and engage in self-care activities when needed. Lastly, seek support from a trusted friend or therapist if you need additional assistance.