is it bad to be single? I go with the flow and got mistreated by partners and I am now single. I do a lot of things normally and go with the flow attitude. I am not currently doing dating apps or trying to find someone as soon as possible (people say I should because i am 33 years old). but i do not like the rush and maybe I might not find someone. is it bad to be single?

I can hear something underneath your question—not just whether being single is "bad," but maybe a worry that there's something wrong with you for being okay with it, or that you're running out of time. And at the same time, there's a kind of quiet knowing in you that rushing hasn't worked before, that going with the flow has sometimes left you vulnerable. That's a lot to hold at once. Let me say this gently: being single isn't bad. It's a state of being, like being in a relationship. Neither one is inherently better or worse—what matters is whether you're at peace with where you are, and whether the way you're living actually protects and nourishes you. What I notice is that you've learned something important from being mistreated. You know now that rushing, or trying too hard to find someone, doesn't serve you. That's wisdom, not failure. But there's a difference between "going with the flow" as a form of self-protection and going with the flow as a genuine openness to life. One is about not choosing, not deciding—and sometimes that leaves us passive in situations that hurt us. The other is about moving through life with awareness, saying yes to what feels right and no to what doesn't, even when it's hard. At 33, you're not running out of time in the way people suggest. But you might be at a crossroads about something deeper: Are you at peace with being single right now? Or are you avoiding the discomfort of really looking, of being vulnerable again, of choosing? There's no shame in either—but it matters to know which one is true for you. If you're genuinely content, then there's nothing to fix. But if there's a part of you that wants connection and is afraid, that's worth listening to. Not to rush into dating apps, but to understand what you actually want, separate from what others say you should want. If it feels right, you might try this: Spend a day noticing what you actually feel drawn toward—not what you think you should want. A conversation that feels real, a person whose company makes you feel more alive, a way of being together that feels safe and honest. Not as a checklist, but just as a gentle inquiry. What does your own heart tell you?