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I feel bad recently. I have been dating this person called Daniel, and he has 3 children. We don't spend a lot of time together, because he has to take care of his kids all the time. We barely meet each other once a week. Earlier this month he told me that he wouldn't be available until the 19th of February, but I am going to take vacation in San Francisco on 22nd and I won't come back until early March. I feel sad because he seems not to care much because he has his children and family and he gets attention from me. He enjoys his life very much while I always struggle when I want to meet him. Also, my ex has been sending pictures of him and his new boyfriend having fun in Brazil. It makes me feel worse. I wonder why it is so hard to find a right person for me now.

Love2/12/2024

HOTOKE AI

Answered by HOTOKE AI

Dear User, I can sense that you are feeling down and frustrated with your current situation. It can be challenging when you feel like you're not receiving the attention and time you desire from the person you're dating. It's natural to feel sad and even a bit neglected when you don't get to spend as much time together as you would like. Additionally, seeing your ex moving on and enjoying himself with his new partner can amplify these negative feelings. From a Buddhist perspective, it's important to acknowledge that suffering arises from our attachments and expectations. When we cling to specific outcomes or conditions, we set ourselves up for disappointment and discontentment. In this case, you may be attaching yourself to the idea of finding the "right" person and expecting your current partner to fulfill all your emotional needs. Buddhism encourages us to let go of these attachments and cultivate contentment within ourselves, rather than relying on others to provide us with happiness. From a psychological perspective, it's crucial to prioritize your own emotional well-being. It's normal to desire a fulfilling and balanced relationship, but it's also essential to ensure that you are taking care of yourself. Reflect on your needs and desires, and consider whether this current relationship aligns with your goals and values. Communication is key - express your feelings and concerns to Daniel in a calm and honest manner. Open up a dialogue about your needs and see if there are ways to compromise and find a balance that works for both of you. Remember, it's important to have realistic expectations and to focus on your own happiness and growth. In terms of coaching advice, I encourage you to take some time for self-reflection and self-care. Explore your own interests and passions, and nurture your own well-being independent of this relationship. Focus on cultivating a sense of self-worth and fulfillment within yourself. Additionally, consider seeking support from a therapist or counselor who can help you navigate your emotions and provide guidance on finding a healthy and balanced relationship. Remember, finding the right person takes time and patience, and it's essential to prioritize your own happiness along the way.