I always want to know how the people who hurt me before what is going on now, and wish them live worse now, I know what I am doing is wrong, but I just cannot let it go and forget it, what should I do?

Dear User, I can understand how difficult it can be to let go of past hurt and pain caused by others. It is natural to want to understand why someone hurt us and to feel anger or resentment towards them. However, this desire to see them suffer is rooted in our own pain and can lead to further suffering for ourselves. Holding onto these negative emotions can cause us to feel stuck in the past and can prevent us from moving forward in our lives. It takes a lot of courage to acknowledge these feelings and to seek help to overcome them. From a Buddhist perspective, it is important to cultivate compassion and forgiveness towards those who have hurt us. This may be difficult, but it can lead to a sense of peace and freedom in our lives. We can recognize that everyone is on their own journey and that their actions may have been influenced by their own pain and suffering. By practicing loving-kindness meditation, we can send positive energy and well wishes to those who have hurt us, and ultimately release ourselves from the negative emotions that have been holding us back. From a psychological perspective, it may be helpful to seek therapy or counseling to work through these feelings. A trained therapist can help us process our emotions and develop healthy coping mechanisms to deal with difficult situations. It is also important to focus on our own healing and self-care, such as practicing mindfulness, exercise, and spending time with loved ones. In terms of coaching advice, I would suggest focusing on personal growth and self-improvement. Instead of wishing ill on those who have hurt us, we can channel our energy into positive actions for ourselves. We can set goals and work towards them, whether it be learning a new skill, volunteering for a cause we believe in, or practicing self-care. By investing in our own growth and happiness, we can move forward from the past and create a brighter future for ourselves.